What made you stop being an addict?
09.06.2025 03:26
Was quitting worth the effort? At least for my mental health, it's a billion times worth it.
But how was I going to do it when everything I knew wasn't working? I didn't know
This was February 2019.
I went there early in the morning trying to watch a movie and I found the CD inside the video player so I decided to watch what was on it and that was the beginning of the life I never wanted.
I made sure I downloaded every video that was nice for me. This took almost the whole day.
All I knew was that, I couldn't masturbate without p*rn. I was first getting the urge to watch p*rn, while watching, I would now feel like masturbating.
Does eating bread before bed make you fat? If so, why?
Is masturbation and p*rn bad?
So I'm still hanging on this lie.
And I can also talk to them now.
I don't know if all addictions are like this 🤔
Read that again ☝️
Now I don't wait to be talked to before I respond. I talk when I think I'm supposed to.
Instagram for iPad is reportedly coming soon; here’s when to expect it - 9to5Mac
So I thought had unlocked a new potential in life. I was doing it even if I don't feel the urge. I forced the urge to come by watching pornography.
I just finished watching the best of the best p*rn videos on the planet. Now there's nothing else to look for on p*rn sites again.
Have I stopped seeing girls as sex objects? Not entirely, I still want to f*ck some of them.
Trump airs frustrations with Xi and Jerome Powell over elusive economic goals - NBC News
I secretly kept on watching and watching until I got 19. At this time, I had started feeling the urge to ejaculate as I was watching the pornography.
I so badly wanted to f*uk a girl, yet I was so shy of girls. I never wanted to meet anyone. I always wanted to hide behind the phone and text.
I knew about masturbation but I didn't actually think of doing it but one day, on my bed when I was preparing to go to school I was watching pornography and something just came in mind; why don't you rob your dick with your hand?
What are some ways to improve speed in sprinting, running uphill, and long/middle distance running?
I did it in my room. I did it in my washroom. I did it in school in the washrooms.
There were times I could go 3 months without watching p*rn or masturbating but somehow I always came back to it.
And these were just the act and not the mental and social problems associated with addiction.
I didn't even start counting the days because I didn't really believe I would get this far.
So all I had to do was to find a way to trick my dirty brain to think that p*rn isn't nice.
I remember sitting on the bed and smiling and that was when it hit me that I have successfully masturbated.
I know some people masturbate and they don't have the problems I went through.
I went on my favourite site and started scrolling through my favourite categories; petite girls, sleeping girls, Japanese girls, Japanese mom, Japanese wife, massage, forced, in the bus, gangb*ng, Muslim girls, ebony, student and teacher, in the classroom, curvy, African, etc
The harder I tried, the worse it became. I could get angry with myself and go about 3 days without it but when I relapse, I can do 3 in a day. And the subsequent days; it's just me getting drowned in the rabbit hole.
Is it true that LGB should drop T?
No self esteem. No confidence. No ambition. Just dreams.
It took me days to finish watching them. Finally I decided to go to the washroom to do The Last Fap.
I saw every girl or woman as a sex object including kid girls. There was no way I would look at a woman and not think of f*cking her.
Just keep trying
Now I know I have all the nice videos on my phone, the rest I don't have, are not nice. So I had to start watching them one after the other. Some of them were even 2 hours long but I made sure I watched every little bit of it.
I knew something had to be done about my wasting existence because if nothing changes, then nothing changes.
I started rubbing it and I liked how I was feeling so I kept on doing it faster and EUREKA, sperms came out of my dick.
RUN 🏃♂️ for your dear life
I did it while watching my sister. I did it while touching my sister 😭 I did it while watching my landlord's daughter.
Do I wake up everyday with lots of energy? No but that's because I have a health problem, which is a story for another day.
I always wished they would sit inappropriately or the wind would blow up their dress so I can see things.
I got tired of always breaking the promises I made to myself.
Oh, and everyday I woke up tired 😫 I never slept early too. My mental health was nothing to write home about.
It didn't feel great after ejaculating but hey, who cares about feelings?
A couple of months later I started hating it and regretting after every session. Yet, I couldn't stop.
Now how do you quit your addiction?
I remember I once did it in my classroom at dawn. I did it in the hospital's washrooms. I did it in the lab where I work; both daytime and midnight.
Am I totally free? I don't know 😕
Remember, if nothing changes, nothing changes.
And I DID IT EVERYDAY
But for me, I would say RUN away from it
Around age 9 I discovered pornography through my uncle, he had left the CD in the video player in the night after enjoying himself.
There were times I was counting the days when I'm clean. But now I don't, because I got tired of counting and relapsing and starting all over again.
Now I have the mental fortitude to face life's every day battles.
I did it in my administrator's office.